Thursday, November 12, 2009

godspeed.

I can't imagine anyone caring whether or not I type something and then post it on here. My thoughts and my life seem so inconsequential and monotonous to me. This is why I can take SUCH a sabbatical from here, and not be phased.

Lately, I have felt mostly like a dish girl, a sandwich maker, a table cleaner, a mediocre friend, a lazy daughter, nap taker, and a not-enough-money maker. This kind of permeating attitude, that seems to have come along with the barrenness of autumn's almost end, is not this kind of mindset that produces the motivation to write, for me, much of anything.

It is the kind of attitude that necessitates change, if a person doesn't want to remain in a disgusting rut for too long.

I am supposed to be looking for new opportunities today. The thought of that is stomach churning and vomit inducing, so I am writing about doing it, instead of doing it. I am also doodling, in my notebook, that's sitting to the left of my black macbook. It's pages are currently adorned with some really beautiful and interesting unnecessary flowers, thanks to my inability to take care of the necessary.

1 comment:

A Nerd and A Free Spirit said...

Well, earlier this week I wanted to write you and say why haven't you posted lately? But then I thought that might be a little rude, so I didn't.

Winter is coming, and I always get a little spring in my step that comes along with that cold air. Maybe that will be a motivator. (-:

~Kathryn