In a moment of weakness, I removed the ear bud to fetch some honey for my tea steamer, and I overheard barista #1 say to barista #2 that "everyone has their own definition of successful". So true. Earbud is back in, and I just turned the music up a little louder.
This is the question I ask you, consumers, friends, siblings, employees, carriers of mortgages and car loans and mothers of children. What is success? And when are you settling? Settling. I hate that word.
The question is raised in every kind of social circle in every kind of city everywhere in the world. I started working at William Sonoma about a month ago, and my coworkers represent all sectors of society, all kinds of backgrounds, and places in life. Some retired attorneys, owners of small businesses and once-full-time-moms that have watched all of their children leave their immediate care. One of the first questions I am usually asked, regardless of the age or sex or personality of the employee, is what I do other than sell over-priced-well-made-home-gadgets to people. In other words, "What is my real job?" Um, well, I...uh...I work at a coffee shop down town. "Oh, really?", they usually say, and I never know what that really means. When I told the retired attorney last Saturday that I didn't work a forty hour a week job, her response was, "Oh, so you just play!" Yes, that's it. Exactly. I find childlike enjoyment from scrubbing left-over soggy food from the bottom of an industrial size sink. And it's a good thing I don't have a real job. Fake jobs are so much more conducive to play. Never mind the fact that I really had to get up at five in the morning to make someone a cup of coffee that added a mild piece of joy to the beginning of their possibly otherwise mundane and excruciatingly painful day.
I haven't an answer, exclusively, for this question. Settling. I am leaning more towards the idea that your definition of "settling" has something to do with your value system, the things in life that are most important to you. And so the question shifts from being about a word that I hate...settling...to a phrase that I love...what do I value?
This is what I am asking myself.
For a look at my first attempt at making bagels, check out my food blog. I even posted pictures!!! mmmmmmm.
2 comments:
perhaps keeping both on your mind is worth while? my knee-jerk response, which I give only because I know myself well enough to know that I will think on this more, then neglect to come back to reveal my thoughts, is that:
maybe settling becomes as such when settling is no longer a worry that is always on your mind?
and maybe it is a value of yours that you would NOT settle in life.
ergo, and this is a LOADED (or perhaps terribly simple) idea that Robb and I have been discussing lately, you should do what you want.
I don't think you are someone who would ever disregard her values (is that even possible?), and thus, whatever you are doing in life, it will be FAR from settling.
oh, girl. I can relate to this on so many levels I don't even know how to comment, but working in the service industry for over a year made me realize that my fear of settling is really a fear of mediocrity, and yes, that depends on your values.
I value living quietly and simply. Drinking coffee and wine and eating well-made food slowly, with friends. Reading and using my hands. Learning to see God in all of it and some things I don't expect.
and I discovered, waiting on these people who had so much more than I did then or do now, that a lot of them were miserably leading mediocre lives. I was too, working for them. So I quit.
I don't have a real job, either, but I have a life. And that's way more important to me.
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